Steven Seagal Runs Like a Girl

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This was sent to me recently and while it’s not remotely new, it’s still fantastic. I grew up watching Steven Seagal movies and never even noticed he ran like a small child, and I’ve even seen small children who don’t run all floppy armed like this guy. So keep doing you Steven, I still Love you.

Hit the jump for the runs

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Key & Peele – Buying Mattress For $ex

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Well into it’s 4th season Key & Peele continue to be one of the best sketch comedies on TV. I’m pretty sure we could dedicate the entire site to Key & Peele and not run out of hilarious stuff to post. Buying Mattress For $ex is the latest to have me rolling, this kind of shit has to happen right? I sure hope that it does, I’d happily give that person the one finger shake.

Hit the jump for sex beds (NSFW)

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Animator Vs. Animation IV

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In the continuing battle between Animator and Animation, there must be a winner, right? Considering everything today is connected I’m going with animation, anything that live within the 1’s and 0’s gets the edge. Awesome work here by Alan Becker, the Animator Vs. Animation series has been great!

Hit the jump for the video

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A Retrospective Review, “Chopping Mall”

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Here at Classy Dicks the writers have a wide array of knowledge usually in varied subjects. A hobby turned interest of mine is campy 80’s horror movies that are just so terrible they’re amazing. Since I’ve seen quite a few in my 28 years, I figured I would chronicle them here for you, the readers. Today I cover the shopping mall horror flick, “Chopping Mall”. This movie was released in 1986 and was directed by Jim Wynorski, whose IMDB page reads like a weird mix between every SYFY movie you’ve seen and an amateur porn director.

But anywho onto the synopsis and review.

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What’s On Your Mind?

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HigtonBros brings us “What’s On Your Mind?” a short film about Facebook, life, and deceit. I love this film, it’s dark and basic in its concept. How much truth it out there in the Facebook world? I’d personally like to take the pessimistic view of “not much”, it’s just my nature. What’s On Your Mind? gives you a first hand look at online deceit and what people will do for that “like” just to feel better. So like this post!

Hit the jump for peace of mind

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The Trials and Tribulations of Being a Skeleton

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With their latest short The Trials and Tribulations of Being a Skeleton Gentleman Scholar give us what some difficulties are with the afterlife. What a shit deal, you’ve already gone through life once and now you need to learn and experience things as an undead skeleton. No thanks, bring me back as a mindless zombie or not at all.

Hit the jump for skeletons

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Science in Motion

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Thank God NASA has nothing else better to do than drop a Bowling Ball and some Feathers from a near zero-G silo somewhere in Ohio, because this video is actually pretty awesome. It’s like a high school science teacher’s wet dream to finally have a video of this experiment because it demonstrates a pretty awesome science theory. If you don’t know what happens, I won’t spoil it for you, but the video is certainly cool to watch. And I mean honestly, if for some reason you’re having trouble trusting Dr. Brian Cox as a physicist just remember this tidbit. He was the keyboard player in D:REAM, and they put out the mega-hit “Things Can Only Get Better” so he has nothing to prove to your sorry, non-90’s-dance-song-keyboard-playing ass.

Hit the jump for some goddamn Science!

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Dumb Ways to Die (Portal Edition)

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This is a parody of Dumb Ways to Die released several years ago regarding train safety in Melbourne, Australia. The song is pretty damn catch like it’s predecessor, and warns about all the crazy ways to die at Aperature Laboratories, the setting of the Portal games. Now I’m sure you could all imagine that a facility run by a crazy rogue AI would be anything but dangerous, but this little ditty proves otherwise. Portal and Portal 2 were some of my favorite games, and just listening to this brought back so many good / sometimes rage inducing memories.

Hit the Jump for Some Catchy Safety Beats

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The Captcha

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FineLeatherJackets bring us “The Captcha”. I’m sure I can speak for the entire interwebs in that captcha’s are the worst thing ever created. No, I’m not a robot and also not an expert on whatever fucking twisted made up language captcha uses. That said, I’ll gladly change my song and dance if every captcha ended with a dancing Gosling from Drive and that soundtrack full of sex…

Hit the jump for craptcha…amirite?

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How It Should Have Ended: Avengers: Age of Ultron Trailer

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How It Should Have Ended (HISHE) has recently tackled the teaser trailer for Avengers: Age of Ultron complete with an alternate ending. Hendo posted on the trailer HERE last week, and while I agree Ultron will probably be the most badass villain in the MCU to date. The Pinocchio quotes in the trailer do take away some (or all) of the badassery, we get it Marvel, Disney owns you.

Hit the jump for ends

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TV Review – Mike Tyson Mysteries

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Back in July Classy Dicks blogged about Mike Tyson Mysteries. The trailer was ridiculous. But to be honest with you, I really didn’t give it any other thought afterwords. Fast forward three months later and Adult Swim presents Mike Tyson’s Mysteries (The End). Holy shit how did I not put this on DVR? The best way I can describe it is the Venture Bros. meets Hanna-Barbera. Norm MacDonald as Pigeon is by far my favorite character, but Tyson’s constant mispronunciation is quickly winning me over, and add the fact he punches the bad guys in the dick… how can this not be a hit? Am I right? Judge for yourself.

Hit the jump for 11 minutes of pure madness euphoria

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