Alamo Draft House is at it again with another zany Anti-Cell Phone ad. ADH has been on the vanguard of trying to get rid of cell phones in theaters and it’s a crusade I can definitely get behind. This clip has Kevin Smith (a personal hero of mine) telling you that if he catches you looking at your cell phone, he’s gonna show you his moobs.
I think this threat is fantastic, because even if it’s an empty threat it gets you thinking. What horrors are you going to see when he lifts his shirt up?? Being a fat person I can give you the inside scoop on this. Fat people don’t wear shirts in the pool and at the beach because it’s a stylish and they’re planning on using their hip dress styles to steal your woman. They’re wearing their shirt because what’s underneath is so damn hideous that the moobs and stomach on every fat person looks like they makes a sad face to accurately describe their inner feelings. A sad face that reminds everyone what one too many ding dongs will do to you down the line. And I think that thought might be just strong enough to make you put your cell phone down for an hour and half and enjoy a flick.
Hit the jump for the video